


Aborisco

by roaminromans



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Gen, a very typical who am i bucky story
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-19
Updated: 2014-12-19
Packaged: 2018-03-02 04:50:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 664
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2800202
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/roaminromans/pseuds/roaminromans
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Two separate men live in his head, the first is fighting to be heard over the steady Russian song that swirls in his head.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Aborisco

He walks carefully through the Smithsonian exhibit. 

There are non-thre-..,People.. There are people everywhere. 

Some take their time walking through the exhibit, trying to read all they can. Others run about taking photos.

He wants to take cover, avoid the flash grenade.

Except the flashes are from cell phones and he isn’t in the middle of combat.

He doesn’t realize he had stopped dead when someone bumps into him and he only stops himself when his metal fingers have already curled into a fist.

He isn’t that man anymore, if you could call the Winter Soldier that. The Winter Soldier’s voice sings in his head in a language he half understands. He doesn’t know who he is anymore, the master assassin or the good old boy soldier. 

Two separate men live in his head, the first is fighting to be heard over the steady Russian song that swirls in his head. 

He wasn’t sure who was winning anymore ever since the carrier.

“I’m with you to the end of the line.” His mission sputtered at him, the Captain’s face was a bloodied mess. The blood on the Captain’s pale skin stood out, redder than the star on the Winter Soldier’s arm. A lump formed in his throat the minute he processed the words the battered man said. 

The Captain’s words struck him somehow, the quieter voice had gained massive traction and the two voices raged in his mind keeping him awake at night.

His first night after the carrier was sleepless and he woke up screaming more than he would have liked. Memories he didn’t recognize flooded back to him and he was overwhelmed. Feelings he couldn’t even begin to name boiled at the back of his throat like bile.

He dragged the Captain’s unconscious body to shore; he still isn’t sure why he did that. Out of all the feelings that were raging within him, it was the first one that felt right. 

He couldn’t be this Bucky Barnes, he was… He was…

He didn’t know anymore.

 

His made his way to the section of the exhibit he had come for. 

A Fallen Comrade.

The man can’t help but bark an uncomfortable laugh, the memories of a fall play at the edge of his mind as he scans the sign. 

A woman frowns at the sound as she strides by him but he doesn’t care.

The section might as well have been a shrine to the fallen Barnes. The little plaques sing the man’s praises and he can’t help but feel what seems like pride crawling through the wreckage of his chest.

A portrait of the handsome soldier stares into the distance and it is like staring into a mirror, except the handsome man has a haircut and has mostly likely been groomed in the past 6 years.

 

“That’s you.” Someone says and he flinches instantly. 

The Captain is standing beside him in plain clothes and it takes a few moments to calm his raging heart. A tradition he had found himself getting used to lately. His own heart beating faster than normal was as foreign to him as the Russian in his head. 

The Captain’s face is hard, the soldier’s voice whispers ways to eliminate the threat but he dismisses it. 

“I had years worth of things I wanted to say, if you somehow made it back.” The Cap laughs weakly; his voice betrays his stoic demeanour as his words drip with a grief beyond what most could comprehend.

The Soldier is almost surprised when he himself understands.

“I don’t even know what to say anymore, I don’t’ even know what to think anymore,” The Cap shuffles closer to him and the Winter Soldier wants to fight but he can’t move his body. “I want to think somewhere in there, Bucky is in you and I want to help you get there.”

The Winter Sol-... No. Bucky nodded, the words tumble from his cracked lips. 

“Till the end of the line.”

**Author's Note:**

> well man 
> 
> this is written in a very passive bucky voice, so passive to the point that its not entirely sure if its him or not.
> 
> poor dude.
> 
> i wrote this for my best buddy really, i love bucky but not as much as they do
> 
> i hope you like it you horrid horrid nerd you
> 
> constructive critiques welcome !


End file.
